[CH] Bad Attitude Chili

Kit Anderson (kitridge@bigfoot.com)
Mon, 19 Jan 1998 02:18:53 -0800 

Former Mainer Jeff Rose wrote;
 
> > I'm thinking of making a big batch of carnivore special chili for my
> > Super Bowl party.  As usual, I can't really use a lot of chile in my
> > chili
> > because it has to be palatable to all guests.  Does anyone have a
> > tried-and-true authentic bean-less chili recipe to share?

Here is the recipe for my chili that appearred in BeeR the magazine and
the Boston Globe. It has won many contests. One word of caution about
contest chili- most winners are not hot. 

I grew up all over the place and was introduced to hot food at a young
age. My wanderings took me to Texas for a while. It was there I learned
that true chili is not some form of bastardized spaghetti sauce or that
abomination eaten with zeal in Cincinati. 

Chili is basic food. It is, in fact, one of the four food groups along
with coffee, bagels, and beer. Meat, onions, chiles. What could be
simpler, right? But then why is the perfect chili recipe so ellusive?
Well, I'll tell ya. It's because people get too far away from the basics
and mix in influences from cultures that have no business making chili.
Cultures like New York and that large flat area between Pittsburgh and
Denver. There are two styles of chili; Texas and New Mexico. Bad
Attitude is from Texas. 

One aside. Watch the spelling. C-H-I-L-I is made with chile. C-H-I-L-E
is: 

   1.God's greatest gift to humans 
   2.a country named after our favorite fruit, and 
   3.how mothers pronounce, " Chile! Gitchyer butt over here!" 

This recipe comes from years of Friday afternoons dedicated to
cards-beer-blow-off-steam sessions while at dental school in south
Texas. We used venison and pork, but any vertabrate is fine. (Armadillo
is not allowed in Texas as it is the Official State Critter and has been
granted asylum from the chili pot.)

Vegetarian chili? Is that like jumbo shrimp? Military intelligence?
Legal ethics? Painless dentist? 

Chili is not supposed to be blow your head off hot. I have two criteria
for proper heat: 
   1.I should sweat under my eyes. 
   2.I should be able to eat the whole bowl without stopping to cool
off. 

There is supposed to be a lot of chile flavor and no tomato flavor. This
can only be had through high quality chile powder and fresh roasted
peppers. 

To bean or not to bean? That is the question for people that like to
discuss things like the meaning of life. Or how many angels can do the
Cotton Eyed Joe on the head of a pin. Or is there a limit to Deion
$anders' ego. 
If you are going to bean, pintos and black are good. Kidney beans are a
sin. 

In time, this recipe has taken on a life of its own. It has been known
to change major weather patterns, cement faltering relationships, depose
minor dictatorships, and affect the outcome of the Superbowl. Remember
to use
its power for good. 

Bad Attitude Chili

serves 6-8 

2 lbs pork roast -- cut into 1" pieces
2 lbs cheap ground beef -- (You'll need the fat. This isn't health
food.)
1/2 cup GOOD chile powder -- (Your local supermarket brand tastes like
cardboard.)
1 HUGE onion -- roughly chopped
1 head garlic -- minced
8 New Mexican green chiles -- roasted, peeled, seeded, chopped.
1 Tbl hot Hungarian paprika -- (This is legal. Paprika is a chile.)
1 Tbl ground cumin
4 beef boullion cubes
1 28 oz can crushed tomatoes -- (Don't worry. You won't even know they
are there.)
1 bottle amber Mexican beer -- (Dos Equiis, Noche Buena, or any
Oktoberfest will do.)
1/4 cup bourbon -- (This is one of those things that just happened.)
2 squares bitter baker's chocolate -- (Not as weird as it sounds.)
salt to taste

Sautee 1/4 of the garlic and onions until translucent. Add 1/4 of the
meat, chile powder and brown. Salt the meat while cooking. Put into your
chili pot. Cast iron is best. Repeat until all the meat is done. Put the
rest of
the ingredients in you chili pot and simmer for for a hour. 

As in any recipe, the amount of ingredients is variable. Add more of
anything you want, especially chiles. 

You now have the power. Use it wisely. The eyes of Texas are upon you! 

***I no longer use the tomatoes. Garry Howard said he could taste them I
couldn't stand for that.

-- 
Kit Anderson				ICQ# 2242257
Bath, Maine				<kitridge@bigfoot.com>
		
"I had the right rib, but it musta been the wrong sauce" - Dr. John