[gardeners] OT - Fwd: For the Floridians
Margaret Lauterbach (gardeners@globalgarden.com)
Tue, 15 Apr 2003 06:24:32 -0600
>Bless this house, oh Lord, we cry.
> Please keep it cool in mid-July.
> Bless the walls where termites dine,
> while ants and roaches march in time.
> Bless our yard where spiders pass
> fire ant castles in the grass.
> Bless the garage, a home to please
> carpenter beetles, ticks and fleas.
> Bless the love bugs, two by two,
> the gnats and mosquitoes that feed on you. Millions of creatures
>that fly or crawl, in Florida, Lord, you've put them all!! But
>this is home, and here we'll stay, So thank you Lord, for insect
>spray.
> HOLD IT.............
> there's more....................
> YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN Florida IN JULY WHEN... ~! The birds
>have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.
> ~ The trees are whistling for the dogs! . ~ The best parking
>place is determined by shade instead of distance.
> ~ Hot water now comes out of both taps. ~ You can make sun
>tea instantly.
> ~ You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding
>iron.
> ~ The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.
> ~ You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your
>car.
> ~ You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
> ~ You actually burn your hand opening the car door. ~ You
>break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m. ~
>Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end
> up lying on the pavement and cook to death?" ~ You realize
>that asphalt has a liquid state. ~ The potatoes cook underground,
>so all you have to do is pull one out
> and add b! utter, salt and ! pepper.
> ~ Farmers are feeding their chicken s crushed ice to keep them
>from
> laying boiled eggs.
> ~ The cows are giving evaporated milk. ah, what a place to call
>home.
>To this we add "Thank you Lord for 365 days without snow".