[gardeners] Hi!
drusus@golden.net (gardeners@globalgarden.com)
Fri, 31 Jul 1998 07:12:03 -0400
>> Hangover: The wrath of grapes.
>>
>> Income Tax: Capital punishment.
>>
>> A used car is not always what it's jacked up to be.
>>
>> Two silkworms were in a race. They ended up in a tie.
>>
>> To my sweetheart: My cooking's gotten better since I fondue.
>>
>> A robber broke into the police station and stole all the toilet seats,
>> and
>> the police didn't have anything to go on.
>>
>> Middle Age: When actions creak louder than words.
>>
>> Egotist: One who is me-deep in conversation.
>>
>> Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused his dentist's Novocain
>> during
>> root canal work? He wanted to transcend dental medication.
>>
>> Did you hear about the woman who started dating rakes and fell on hard
>> tines?
>>
>> Why won't melons elope in Las Vegas? They cantaloupe.
>>
>> Q: What do Christmas and a crab on the beach have in common?
>> A: They both involve sandy claws.
>>
>> Archeologist: A man whose career lies in ruins.
>>
>> Kleptomaniac: One who can't help himself from helping himself.
>>
>> Did you hear about the snake who gave birth to a bouncing baby boa?
>>
>> Once I got angry at the chef of an Italian restaurant, so I gave him a
>> pizza
>> my mind.
>>
>> The fish secretary lodged herself in a pipe and could no longer type.
>> Her
>> doctor said, "This is a clear case of 'Carp in tunnel' syndrome."
>>
>> A friend of mine who commutes to work everyday through the Lincoln
>> Tunnel
>> with a bunch of co- workers recently complained about what a pain it
>> was. I
>> told him that he may have a bad case of "car pool tunnel syndrome."
>>
>> California smog test: Can UCLA?
>>
>> The competition at a local dog show was quite "Ruff"
>>
>> Q: How did the pig with laryngitis feel?
>> A: Dis-gruntled.