Re: [gardeners] Re: What's in the Basement?
Harry Boswell (gardeners@globalgarden.com)
Wed, 24 Feb 1999 10:02:15 -0600
----- Original Message -----
From: bsk <bsk@brightok.net>
Subject: [gardeners] Re: What's in the Basement?
>Yes Gaye mice do such things!
Gay mice do these things? I never would have imagined! Aunt Nelda Mae just
plain fainted away when I read it to her, she just hates all this talk about
private matters, you know. Anyway, when she came to, she started wondering
just how you know if they're gay, you know, they're so tiny anyway, and you
must
need a magnifying glass, but about that time she got all flustered again and
fainted
dead away. And then Aunt Nelda Lou came in and saw Nelda Mae, and Nelda Lue
got too excited and she fainted dead away. Well, when Nelda Mae came to,
she
saw Nelda Lou, and dangnabit if she didn't drop right back off. Well, it
turns out
Nelda Lou had come into the house to get some rags for Uncle Homer, he's
still trying to fix the 1963 Dodge that Aunt Nelda Jean shot with buckshot
the
night she took those pills Doc Mitchell gave her because she thought she had
pig fever, they made her real crazy, you remember, and she thought aliens
had
landed just behind the cucumbers, and she got Homer's shotgun and went to
blast
them, but what she really did was trip over our old dog Buck, he was
sleeping up on
the porch that night 'cause it was so hot, but when Nelda Jean tripped over
Buck, she
fell into the porch railing and busted it right up, and she fell right off
the porch, but while
she was trying to get up, Buck, he had decided it wasn't so hot after all
and he was
headed back under the porch, but he ran over Nelda Jean as she was getting
up,
and she thought the aliens had her, so she fired the shotgun, but the poor
Dodge
was between her and the cucumbers by this time, and the while front got a
double
load of buckshot, and it hasn't run yet. But when the gun went off, Buck
thought
she was after him, and he started running, and far as I know he hasn't
stopped
running yet. Anyway, Homer keeps working on that car, and I keep looking
for
Buck. So, Homer comes in, and sees Nelda Mae and Nelda Lou laid out on the
floor and he ran to call Doc Mitchell, but I had gone to the kitchen to get
some cold
water, and about the time Homer got to the door, I was coming through it,
and
I opened it right on him, and dangnabit now Homer's laid out over by the
space
heater. So get rid of those gay mice, 'cause you can see what kind of
trouble they
cause. But I still don't know how you'll tell the gay ones, and I'm sure
not gonna
ask Nelda Mae.